This blog is about the flipped learning approach to the novel The Only Story by Julian Barnes. This task was assigned by Dilip Barad.
Julian Barnes’s 'The Only Story' (2018) explores love, memory, and the lasting impact of youthful passion. It follows Paul, a nineteen-year-old student, and his unconventional relationship with Susan, a much older married woman, set in 1960s England. Through a shifting narrative perspective, the novel reflects on emotional dependence, the unreliability of memory, and the pain intertwined with love, ultimately questioning romantic ideals and the true cost of loving deeply.
Video 1 :- Introduction | Character | Plot Summary
The novel employs a non-linear narrative, moving back and forth between past and present, which requires readers to actively reconstruct the sequence of events. This fragmented structure mirrors the complex nature of memory and its role in shaping how relationships are understood. As Paul revisits his earlier decisions, his relationship with Susan brings forward themes of responsibility, guilt, and regret, revealing the painful dimensions of love that extend beyond romantic idealism. Memory becomes central to the formation of identity, demonstrating how earlier experiences continue to influence present emotions and perceptions of love and loss.
Unlike traditional romantic narratives, The Only Story resists idealizing love. Instead, it offers a realistic and often unsettling portrayal of relationships, highlighting emotional dependence, imbalance, and long-term consequences. Paul’s narration is subjective and unreliable, prompting readers to question the truth of his account and to consider the tension between personal memory and objective reality. Susan’s battle with alcoholism and emotional trauma deepens the novel’s psychological complexity, showing how unresolved pain can shape behavior and relationships. Much like Barnes’s The Sense of an Ending, this novel examines memory, love, and the enduring effects of personal choices, emphasizing how the past remains inescapably present.
Approximate Year
Paul’s Age
Event Description
Early 1960s
19
Paul meets Suzanne at tennis club; begins affair.
1960s-1970s
19-29
Affair with Suzanne continues; they live together; Suzanne’s alcoholism and dementia worsen.
Late 1970s
~30
Paul leaves Suzanne and moves abroad to pursue career.
1980s-1990s
45-50
Last meeting between Paul and Suzanne; she is elderly and severely ill.
Present (~2018)
~70
Paul narrates the story, reflecting on past and his complex feelings of love, responsibility, remorse.
Video 2 :- Joan | Character Study
John is portrayed as a complex and quietly strong character whose life intersects with Susan and Gerald through memory and conversation. Known to Paul only through Susan’s recollections, John is introduced as Gerald’s sister and Susan’s close friend, who later dies of leukemia. In contrast to Susan’s unstable marriage and psychological struggles, John responds to life’s difficulties with calm endurance. Her close attachment to her dogs reflects her need for companionship and emotional balance as she ages.
Animals play a vital role in John’s life, offering her comfort and reliability where human relationships fall short. While Susan is overwhelmed by her circumstances, John finds stability in routine and the unconditional presence of her pets. Her relationship with a married man complicates her moral position, yet the novel presents this as a conscious choice rather than a sign of victimhood. John’s straightforward nature and rejection of social conventions mark her independence, reinforcing the novel’s themes of identity, personal freedom, and the lasting influence of past experiences.
Video 3 :- Memory in Novel | Memory and History | Memory and Morality
Julian Barnes’s 'The Only Story' examines memory as a layered and complex concept, forming the central concern of the discussion. The talk opens by contrasting collective history with personal remembrance, highlighting how shared narratives shape our understanding of the past, while individual memory remains subjective and emotionally influenced. It raises doubts about the reliability of memory, suggesting that recollections can be reshaped by personal bias, emotion, or even deliberate distortion.
The discussion then turns to the film 'Memento', where the protagonist’s memory loss complicates moral responsibility for his actions. This idea is further connected to Barnes’s 'The Sense of an Ending' and postcolonial approaches to memory and trauma, particularly through the work of Dipesh Chakrabarty. The session explores how fragmented or altered memories affect identity, ethics, and one’s sense of truth.
By drawing on 'Memento', the talk deepens its focus on the moral implications of memory, proposing that forgetting can enable individuals to escape accountability. This perspective links memory to trauma, showing how painful experiences may lead people to reshape or suppress memories as a means of psychological survival.
Video 4 :- Narrative Patten
The video discussion analyses the narrative technique of Julian Barnes’s The Only Story, highlighting its combination of conventional storytelling and modern experimental methods. The speaker explains how Barnes shifts between first-, second-, and third-person narration to create an intentionally unreliable account. The novel is framed through the reflections of a seventy-year-old man who revisits his first love, using fragmented memories and flashbacks to reconstruct his younger self. Central to the discussion are themes of memory and the instability of personal history, which significantly influence the novel’s structure and meaning. The talk also addresses the philosophical dimensions of love, pain, and human experience, suggesting that love—whether joyful or tragic—often leads to lasting emotional consequences. Barnes blends narrative progression with reflective commentary, prompting readers to examine their own emotional and moral understandings.
The discussion further emphasizes how the novel presents love as both life-changing and destructive. Memory is shown to be subjective and unreliable, as the protagonist’s recollections are shaped by regret, desire, and self-justification, complicating the reader’s ability to determine what truly occurred. This uncertainty aligns with modern philosophical debates about truth and remembrance. Although Paul’s first love is deeply significant, it causes enduring suffering, challenging romantic ideals that present love as purely fulfilling.
Through the protagonist’s reflective journey, Barnes explores broader questions of identity and authenticity. The novel considers how personal narratives contribute to the formation of the self. By directly addressing the reader, Barnes dissolves the boundary between fiction and reality, encouraging skepticism toward the narrator’s version of events. The fragmented structure of The Only Story mirrors the unpredictability of life itself, inviting readers to reflect on how memory, time, and perception shape their own lived experiences.
Video 5 :- Question of Responsibility
The video examines the theme of responsibility in Julian Barnes’s The Only Story, focusing on how Paul Roberts reflects on his past and the complicated nature of responsibility within relationships. Paul repeatedly questions whether his own thoughtlessness played a role in the suffering he experiences, particularly in his relationship with Susan and her unhappy marriage to Gordon. The discussion highlights how individuals often distance themselves from responsibility, especially in situations involving trauma such as domestic conflict, and presents responsibility as something shared and interconnected, symbolized through images like a chain.
The video further considers the impact of social expectations on how responsibility is understood, noting that fear of judgment can lead people to avoid uncomfortable truths. Using the metaphor of a snake moving around obstacles, it suggests that flexibility and awareness are necessary for emotional maturity and healthy relationships. Rather than placing blame on a single individual, the discussion stresses the importance of recognizing how actions and experiences are linked. Ultimately, the video encourages close textual analysis and self-reflection, presenting responsibility as a complex, deeply personal process that demands honesty, awareness, and accountability.
Video 6 :- Theme of Love | Passion and Suffering
The analysis examines the link between passion and pain in love, starting with the word "passion," which comes from the Latin meaning "to suffer." This suggests that love always involves both intense feelings and suffering. The complexity of love is shown through Paul’s memories of his relationship with Susan, an older, married woman.
The novel focuses on philosophical ideas about love, desire, and the human experience, rather than just events. It explores how love is shaped by personal choices and cultural expectations, often leading to regret and pain. Paul and Susan’s struggles highlight how love can bring despair, while challenging traditional views of love often seen in books and movies.
Through Paul’s reflections, the story shows how our understanding of love and pain changes over time. It critiques typical love stories that overlook the harsh reality of relationships, prompting readers to think about their own experiences. The idea that unmet desires lead to emotional distress is clear in Susan’s struggles with her past. The final question asks if love is worth the pain, encouraging readers to reflect on their own relationships.
Video 7 :- Theme of Marriage | Critique of Marriage Institution
The discussion argues that marriage and love do not always function harmoniously. It challenges the common belief that marriage sustains romantic passion, suggesting instead that desire often diminishes once the institution of marriage is established. By drawing parallels with literary works such as Thomas Hardy’s Jude the Obscure, the speaker shows that skepticism toward marriage as a guarantee of happiness has long existed. Contemporary acceptance of divorce and non-marital relationships further reflects changing cultural attitudes toward commitment.
Through characters like Susan and Gordon, the novel exposes the difficulties within marriage, including emotional neglect and abuse. Social pressure surrounding marital respectability emerges as a significant issue, with Susan’s silence reflecting the stigma attached to admitting marital unhappiness. Barnes employs humor to highlight the contradictions and absurdities of marriage, using it as a tool to reveal deeper emotional and social tensions. The discussion also notes how the English middle class tends to avoid confronting marital problems, allowing suffering to persist unchallenged.
By separating love from the institution of marriage, the analysis questions traditional assumptions and encourages alternative ways of understanding relationships. Ultimately, the discussion invites readers to reconsider ideas of marriage, love, and commitment, advocating a more flexible and open perspective on modern relationships.
Video 8 :- To Ways to Look at Life
In this lesson, the narrator looks at two different ideas about life: free will and inevitability, through the thoughts of the main character, Paul Roberts. The metaphor of life as a river is used, with people compared to captains of their ships, trying to navigate the uncertain waters of life. The first idea focuses on personal choice, suggesting that every decision we make closes off other possibilities, leading to a life full of various choices. This view often causes people to dwell on "what-ifs" and feel regret about their decisions.
The second idea is that life is a series of events that are unavoidable, like a log floating down a river. In this view, people have no control and are carried along by fate and circumstances. The narrator shows that Paul often goes back and forth between these two perspectives, trying to find a balance between his own control and the limits placed on him by the world around him. The story ultimately explores how both free will and fate can shape our lives, creating a complex and delicate balance.
Worksheet
2. Key Takeaways: After reviewing all the resources, identify the three most
important themes or ideas you found most compelling or thought-
provoking. For each one:
o Explain the idea in your own words.
o Provide examples from the novel that illustrates the idea.
o Explain why you think the idea is significant for understanding the novel.
The Memories We Choose to Keep
Paul Roberts’s narrative reveals how memory is often selective, preserving what feels comfortable while pushing aside what is painful or inconvenient. He consciously shapes his recollections, frequently downplaying his own shortcomings. A comparable pattern appears in The Artist of the Floating World, where Masuji Ono initially avoids confronting his past actions but is eventually forced to acknowledge them. His selective remembering hides his role in promoting nationalism through art, illustrating how individuals construct personal histories through deliberate choices.
Understanding Love
The novel presents love in a grounded and unsentimental manner, emphasizing that both romantic and marital relationships are marked by tension and disagreement. People turn to love in search of fulfillment, yet unmet expectations often lead to disappointment and conflict. The question, “Would you rather love deeply and suffer greatly, or love less and suffer less?” captures this central conflict. Paul and Susan’s relationship fails to bring lasting happiness, while Joan’s emotional pain further disrupts idealized portrayals of love found in literature and film. Barnes thus offers a more honest depiction of love, exposing its flaws and limitations.
Recognizing Personal Responsibility
Although Paul attempts to silence uncomfortable truths, he does not completely deny his own errors. His reflections suggest that self-examination is necessary for understanding the past. While memory-driven narratives allow room for distortion, attentive reading uncovers underlying realities. The novel ultimately stresses the importance of introspection, encouraging individuals to acknowledge their own failings instead of placing blame solely on others.
3. Character Analysis: Choose two characters from the novel (e.g. Paul,
Suzanne, Joan). For each character, discuss:
o Their role in the narrative.
o Their key traits and motivations.
o How the narrative perspective shapes the reader's understanding of
the character.
o How the character contributes to the themes of the novel.
Paul
Paul, the narrator, recalls his past love for Suzanne. At 19, he believes their love is pure, but over time, he struggles with her alcoholism and dishonesty. Eventually, he leaves, torn between love and responsibility. As an unreliable narrator, his memories are selective, making the reader question whether he truly loved Suzanne or was chasing an ideal. His story highlights how love can turn into suffering, how people reshape memories, and how regret shapes identity.
Susan Macleod
Susan Macleod is a central character in The Only Story and the focus of Paul’s first love. An older, married woman, she challenges social conventions and offers Paul an intense but unconventional relationship. Emotionally vulnerable and trapped in an unhappy marriage, Susan seeks affection and escape, which draws her to Paul. As the novel progresses, her struggles with alcoholism and isolation reveal her fragility. Seen only through Paul’s memories, Susan remains complex and ambiguous, contributing to the novel’s themes of love, responsibility, suffering, and the limits of memory.
4. Narrative Techniques: Discuss the narrative techniques employed by
Julian Barnes in The Only Story, considering:
o The use of first-person narration and its limitations.
o The shifting perspectives and unreliable narrator.
o The non-linear timeline and use of flashbacks.
o The impact of these techniques on the reader's experience.
o How this narrative is different from other novels you may have read.
In 'The Only Story', Julian Barnes adopts an unconventional narrative approach by presenting the story entirely through Paul’s perspective. Because the novel is narrated in the first person, readers are limited to Paul’s thoughts and interpretations rather than an objective account of events. This restricted viewpoint makes Paul an unreliable narrator, as his memories may be altered or reshaped to ease feelings of guilt or self-justification, preventing readers from fully trusting his version of the past.
The narrative does not progress in a linear order; instead, it moves back and forth across different stages of Paul’s life. This fragmented structure mirrors the way memory functions in reality—uneven, selective, and incomplete. Barnes further emphasizes Paul’s emotional distancing by shifting the narrative voice from “I” to “you” and “he,” suggesting his reluctance to confront earlier actions and responsibilities.
Through these narrative strategies, readers are drawn into Paul’s emotional world while simultaneously being encouraged to question the accuracy of his recollections. Rather than offering a straightforward romantic tale, the novel presents love as an experience marked by suffering and regret. The reflective and fragmented storytelling gives the impression of a man looking back on his life with uncertainty, remorse, and lingering emotional pain.
5. Thematic Connections: Explore the following themes and their
interconnections in The Only Story:
o Memory and Unreliability: How does the novel explore the
subjective nature of memory? How does this relate to the idea of
truth within a narrative?
o Love, Passion, and Suffering: How does the novel present love,
and what is its relationship to suffering and pain? How are these
ideas connected to Laconian ideas about desire?
o Responsibility and Cowardice: In what ways is the protagonist,
Paul, presented as unreliable and cowardly? How does he avoid
responsibility, and what are the consequences?
o Critique of Marriage: How does the novel challenge the institution
of marriage?
o Two ways to look at life: How does the novel present these two
extremes of viewing life?
Memory and Narrative Uncertainty:
In The Only Story, Paul’s recollection of the past is often fragmented and unreliable. He reshapes or omits certain details, which leads readers to question the accuracy of his account. The novel suggests that truth is subjective and dependent on individual memory, showing how personal histories are constructed by those who remember and retell them.
Love, Desire, and Pain:
Love in the novel is presented not as a source of happiness but as an experience deeply intertwined with suffering. Paul’s intense attachment to Susan brings him lasting emotional pain. Barnes portrays love as an overwhelming force that can consume individuals, revealing how desire often results in loss and disillusionment rather than fulfillment.
Responsibility and Avoidance:
Paul frequently avoids taking responsibility for his actions. He fails to support Susan during moments of abuse and emotional breakdown, choosing distance instead of commitment. This avoidance becomes a source of long-term guilt and regret, preventing him from achieving emotional closure or peace.
Criticism of Marriage:
The novel offers a critical view of marriage, depicting it as restrictive and damaging rather than nurturing. Susan’s marriage to Gordon is shown as abusive and oppressive, reinforcing Paul’s belief that marriage suppresses love and personal freedom instead of sustaining them.
Contrasting Perspectives on Life:
Barnes presents two contrasting views of human existence: one that suggests individuals can shape their own destiny, like steering a vessel, and another that views life as unpredictable and uncontrollable, like drifting with a current. Paul initially believes he can control his love and future, but experience teaches him that life is governed by uncertainty. This tension encourages readers to reflect on the extent to which human lives are shaped by choice versus uncontrollable forces.
6. Personal Reflection: Consider the question posed at the beginning of the novel: "Would you rather love the more and suffer the more, or love the less and suffer the less?".
How does the novel explore this question?
The novel explores the question, "Would you rather love more and suffer more, or love less and suffer less?" through Paul's journey. As a young man, Paul believes love is worth any pain, and he falls deeply in love with Suzanne. But over time, their love causes more hurt than happiness, and Paul starts to wonder if it was worth it.
The novel shows that love often brings pain, and those who love deeply can get hurt the most. By the end, Paul is alone, questioning if the suffering he went through was worth the love. The book doesn’t give a clear answer, leaving the reader to think about whether it’s better to love deeply, even with the pain, or protect themselves by loving less.
What are your thoughts on this question, and how does this novel relate to your own experiences and views on love and life?
The novel challenges the idea that love leads to happiness and shows how love is closely linked with both passion and suffering. It suggests that people often try to fill an inner emptiness with love, hoping it will make them whole. When love works out, everything seems fine, but when it doesn’t, bigger problems arise. If love falls short, it becomes difficult to move on or coexist peacefully. The story conveys that depending on others for our happiness often causes pain, as it leaves us vulnerable and unable to find contentment within ourselves.
7. Creative Response:
• Imagine you are one of the characters from the novel (other than Paul).
Write a journal entry from their perspective reflecting on the events of the
novel.
• Alternatively, write a short piece exploring how one of the themes in the
novel relates to contemporary society.
Journal Entry from Suzanne's Perspective
March 12, 1975
I’ve spent so many years trapped in the same cycle. Paul was everything to me once, but I pushed him away. I thought love could fix me, but it just dragged us both down. I wanted him to see me as perfect, but I’m far from it. I made mistakes, and now he’s gone.
I tried to fill a hole inside me with love, but it never worked. Now I’m left with memories and my dogs, who never ask for anything. But even they die, leaving me with nothing. I wonder if I was ever capable of truly loving or just chasing an illusion.
Short Piece on Love and Suffering in Society
In The Only Story, love and suffering are closely tied, and this theme is still relevant today. Society idealizes love, making people believe it’s the answer to all their problems. But like in the novel, love often brings pain when it doesn’t meet expectations.
Today, many seek love to fill an internal void, but this often leads to disappointment. Love is not always the perfect fix; it can also bring frustration and sadness. True fulfillment comes from within, not from another person. In the modern world, we must recognize that love, while meaningful, doesn’t always provide lasting happiness.
Barad, Dilip. "Exploring Narrative Patterns in Julian Barnes' The Only Story." LangLit, vol. 6, no. 4, May 2020, pp. 179–188. ResearchGate, https://www.researchgate.net/publication/371874310. Accessed 25 Dec. 2025.
Barad, Dilip. "Symbolism of Crossword Puzzles: Order, Intellect, and Existential Respite in Julian Barnes's The Only Story." LangLit, vol. 8, no. 1, Aug. 2021, pp. 285–291. ResearchGate, https://www.researchgate.net/publication/372537102. Accessed 25 Dec. 2025.
Barad, Dilip. “The Only Story.” The Only Story, 3 Feb. 2022, blog.dilipbarad.com/2022/02/the-only-story.html. Accessed 25 Dec. 2025.
Barnes, Julian. The Only Story. Jonathan Cape, 20 February 2018. ISBN-13: 987-1787330696
DoE-MKBU. “Introduction | Character | Plot Summary | the Only Story | Julian Barnes.” YouTube, 31 Jan. 2022, www.youtube.com/watch?v=46Lxx-C5Tg0.
DoE-MKBU. “Memory Novel | Memory and History | Memory and Morality | the Only Story | Julian Barnes.” YouTube, 2 Feb. 2022, www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4yoNBCzrUs.
DoE-MKBU. “Theme of Love | Passion and Suffering | the Only Story | Julian Barnes.” YouTube, 2 Feb. 2022, www.youtube.com/watch?v=7f7hCKtGkGI.
DoE-MKBU. “Theme of Marriage | Critique of Marriage Institution | the Only Story | Julian Barnes.” YouTube, 3 Feb. 2022, www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCrSyV2jXzI.
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